儿子提着一袋酒瓶对父亲说:“爸爸,我把这些铜锤卖到废品店去,可以吗?” 父亲奇怪地问:“你明明提着的是酒瓶,怎么会是铜锤?” 儿子说:“这可是你说的呀!” 父亲觉得莫名奇妙,就问:“我什么时候说过的?” 儿子说:“前天下午,你喝完酒后,不是抓着两个酒瓶在市场里东摇西晃地,边走边喊:‘我……我手里拿着的是……铜锤,谁敢挡……路,就,就尝尝它……的厉害吗?”[丈夫杰克是一个电视迷。一天他问他的妻子今天有什么新的剧情,妻子说:“ 罗娜的丈夫因为抢劫而被捕,露丝堕胎了,杉姆跳楼了,茹如因为吸毒而死,他的妹妹没钱上学,汤姆袭警被抓。” 丈夫叫到:“这部片子叫什么名字?”妻子说:“美好人生。”[Theanimalswerebored.Finally,thelionhadanidea."Iknowareallyexcitinggamethatthehumansplaycalledfootball.I‘veseenitonT.V."Heproceededtodescribeittotherestoftheanimalsandtheyallgotexcitedaboutitsotheydecidedtoplay.Theywentouttothefieldandchoseupteamsandwerereadytobegin.Thelion‘steamreceived.Theywereabletogettwofirstdownsandthenhadtopunt.Themulepuntedandtherhinowasbackdeepforthekick.Hecaughttheball,loweredhisheadandcharged.First,hecrushedaroadrunner,thentworabbits.Hegoredawildebeast,knockedovertwocows,andbrokethroughtodaylight,scoringsix.Unfortunately,theylackedaplacekicker,andthescoreremained6-0.Lateinthefirsthalfthelion‘steamscoredatouchdownandthemulekickedtheextrapoint.Thelion‘steamledathalftime7-6.Inthelockerroom,theliongaveapeptalk."Lookyouguys.Wecanwinthisgame.We‘vegottheleadandtheyonlyhaveonerealthreat.We‘vegottokeeptheballawayfromtherhino,he‘sakiller.Mule,whenyoukickoffbesuretokeepitawayfromtherhino."Thesecondhalfbegan.Justasthemulewasabouttokickoff,therhino‘steamchangedformationandtheballwentdirectlytotherhino.Onceagain,therhinoloweredhisheadandwasoffrunning.First,hestompedtwogazelles.Heskeweredazebra,andbulldozedanelephantoutoftheway.Itlookedlikehewashomefree.Suddenlyatthetwentyyardline,hedroppedoverdead.Therewerenootheranimalsinsightanywherenearhim.Thelionwentovertoseewhathadhappened.Rightnexttothedeadrhinohesawasmallcentipede."Didyoudothis?"heaskedthecentipede."Yeah,Idid."thecentipedereplied.Thelionretorted,"Wherewereyouduringthefirsthalf?""Iwasputtingonmyshoes."[ 详情
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